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Overheard a dad at my kid's soccer game say something that hit me hard about my divorce | Divorce Support - Vivisector

Overheard a dad at my kid's soccer game say something that hit me hard about my divorce

I was standing on the sideline last Saturday watching my son play and this other dad was talking to his buddy about his split. He said, "I spent so long being angry about what I lost that I forgot to see what I still had." That line just stopped me cold. I've been divorced for about 14 months now and I've been stuck in this loop of replaying fights and counting up all the stuff she took. Made me think maybe I need to shift my focus to the little things I do have, like having my kid half the week and a quiet house when he's not here. Has anyone else had a random comment from a stranger totally change how they looked at things?.

3 comments

3 Comments

fisher.thomas2mo ago

My buddy Carl heard something similar at a gas station of all places. He was getting coffee and some old guy in a pickup just started talking to him, said "Son, you look like you're carrying the whole world on your shoulders." Carl had just gone through his own split and was bitter about losing the house and the dog. The guy told him about how his wife died ten years ago and he spent five of those years just mad at the universe, until his daughter told him he was missing her growing up. Carl said that conversation basically snapped him out of his funk because here was a dude who lost someone permanently, not just to a divorce, and he still found a way to move forward. He started focusing on his kids more after that, stopped badmouthing his ex in front of them, and honestly he seems a lot lighter now.

the_alice2mo ago

Strangers can drop a truth bomb you'd never take from a friend. That perspective shift is real, seeing someone who lost everything and still found a way back. Good on Carl for actually listening and changing.

simonk982mo ago

Got a buddy named Mike who was on a fishing trip and some random guy at the dock told him he was holding his rod too tight. Said loosening up catches more fish but also applies to life apparently. Mike said it hit him weird because he was stressing over work and his dad's health at the time and just hearing that from a complete stranger made him actually chill out for the first time in months.