c/elder-care-planning

Warning: Getting my mom's VA benefits set up for in-home care took over 8 months

We started the paperwork in January thinking it would be a simple approval, but the back-and-forth with the regional office was unreal. They kept asking for the same documents we'd already sent, like her marriage certificate to my dad (who passed in 2010) three separate times. It wasn't until late August that we finally got the Aid and Attendance benefit approved so we could hire help. Has anyone else hit a wall this big with government care programs?

My dad's neighbor in Florida said to just put everything in a joint account... that was a $15,000 mistake.

I thought the 'life alert' style buttons were a scam until my mom fell in our kitchen in Akron.

We got her a basic system from a company called LifeCall after her doctor suggested it, and I was really doubtful it was worth the $35 a month. Last Tuesday, she slipped and couldn't reach the phone, but she pressed the button on her wrist and help was there in under 8 minutes. Has anyone else had a similar experience that changed their mind about a safety device?

Why does nobody talk about the 'granny pod' zoning loophole in our county?

We avoided a $6k/month nursing home by putting a permitted tiny home in my parents' backyard, which our local code allows as an 'accessory dwelling unit' for family. Has anyone else found a similar workaround where they live?

My mom's medical alert system went offline for a full day last week

The base unit just stopped connecting to the monitoring center. I found out because I called to check in and she said the help button wasn't lighting up. I had to drive over, unplug it, wait ten minutes, and plug it back in to get it working again. Has anyone else had this kind of random failure with these systems?

Can we talk about trying to get my dad to use a pill organizer

Honestly, I bought a big weekly one with the days labeled, thinking it was a no-brainer. He filled it once, then refused to use it again, saying it made him feel 'managed'. Ngl, I learned that just buying the tool isn't enough, you have to get their buy-in first. Has anyone else had a parent totally reject a simple organization aid?

I heard a neighbor say they're putting their mom in a home because 'it's just easier' and it's been on my mind all week.

Paid $2,000 for a 'comprehensive' in-home care assessment that basically just told us to hire an in-home caregiver.

My mom's fall in her kitchen last Tuesday has me scrambling for home safety ideas

She slipped on a wet spot near the sink in her house in Tampa and bruised her hip pretty bad. We're looking at grab bars and non-slip mats, but I'm worried about the whole layout now. Has anyone done a full home safety check for a parent recently and have a good checklist to follow?

Just wasted $300 on a 'universal' fall monitor for my mom that never worked right

My dad's new doctor in Phoenix asked him to list his medications from memory and he couldn't name a single one.

That's when I realized I was wrong to just keep a paper list in the kitchen, and I started using a free app called Medisafe on both our phones so we both get refill alerts and can update it instantly.

Serious question, my dad's mood improved a ton after we got him a dog walker 3 times a week.

He was really isolated in his apartment in Tampa. Now he's chatting with the walker and even goes to the park sometimes. Anyone have tips for other low-cost social activities for seniors?

Finally got my mom's daily meds sorted after a month of chaos

For the last four weeks, my mom's pill routine was a mess. She was on seven different meds, some twice a day, some with food. She kept missing doses or taking the wrong ones. I bought one of those plastic weekly organizers with the little boxes for morning and night. I sat down with her doctor's list and filled it up every Sunday. The change was huge. After just one week of using it, she hasn't missed a single pill. Her mood is better and she's not as confused in the afternoons. It was a simple fix but it took a lot of stress off both of us. Has anyone else found a good system for managing a bunch of different prescriptions?

Fast way to sell a house in Renton without repairs?

My mom needs to move into assisted living ASAP and her house needs about 50k in work. We need cash fast to pay for her care facility. Who can we sell to?